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Cry Havoc and Let Slip the Dogs of Nerf - We're All Mad Here
You can tell I'm mad because I have straw in my hair.
baronmind
baronmind
Cry Havoc and Let Slip the Dogs of Nerf
A few weeks back, calloocallay gave me an excellent Do Something Different Day idea: build a pillow fort. She showed me one that she'd recently built, but bemoaned the fact that it was more of a tent, and less of a structure to "keep out the marauding hordes."

I decided that, despite the fact that marauding hordes visit my house infrequently at best, which I suspect is due to the steep driveway as no one likes to maraud uphill, I too needed a pillow fort for defense. Fortunately for me, my house has a natural choke point right at the entrance -- the front hallway connects diagonally to the main room, so that the walls narrow in and then expand back out. This is where I decided my fort should be built.

The first thing I did was set up a barricade for defense.
I posted some guards along the top, too. Taking first watch were a headless horseman, a gargoyle, and Cthulhu with a gun.
If the image of Cthulhu with a gun doesn't make your blood run cold, doesn't strike terror into your heart, then by God, man! What are you made of?

Obviously, I also needed an entrance to this fort, so I built one in back, decorated with the body parts of my fallen enemies, and also a stylish hat:
As with any good pillow fort, you had to crawl to get inside, not to mention having to squeeze past my grisly trophies:

Once inside, however, it was really quite roomy. It was maybe three feet high, and I could stretch completely out in several different directions:



I also had a lamp, since I figured the hordes would be more likely to maraud at night, and I didn't want to be sitting around in the dark waiting for them:

The lamp produced some spooky effects, which I think might have scared the hordes off entirely, as they never showed.
So I ended up just camping out in there for the night.

The main thing about building a pillow fort now, as opposed to when you're a kid, is that you have to make it much larger and sturdier. Also, electricity never seemed to be a necessity before, but I definitely needed a lamp, a fan and an alarm clock in this one. However, I had one major benefit now that I never had before: I could take every cushion off of every surface in the house, and there's no one to yell, "What on earth do you think you're doing?"



The weirdest thing happened on the way to work this morning. I was driving down the freeway, doing 72 in a 65 just like everyone else. As we passed one of the entrances, a police car merged onto the freeway, and no one slowed down. It was bizarre! There's always at least that one guy who sees a cop and nails his brakes, slowing down to no more than five under the speed limit. Most of the rest of the people, who are generally quite happy to go clipping along at ten or fifteen over, suddenly seem unable to drive any faster than the speed limit, even if the cop is clearly greatly exceeding it himself. But today, it was like I was in some alternate universe where people don't freak out every time a cop exists on the freeway. I appreciated it, certainly, but it was a bit unnerving.

Mood of the Moment: accomplished accomplished
Auditory Hallucination: Fatboy Slim -- Because We CanCan from prolixfootle

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Comments
From: jumpintheleaves Date: May 21st, 2004 06:06 am (UTC) (Link)
Ah, this brings back fond memories of childhood.

While I took pleasure in convincing the babysitter that I was allowed to turn my parents bedroom into a fort, my favorite thing was to make a circus. The look on my parents faces when they would discover my brother trying to walk across rope strung between our dressers was priceless.
From: sleepinbeauty Date: May 21st, 2004 06:29 am (UTC) (Link)
So it's always been the case that insane Northern Virginia drivers go 20 over the speed limit but on my way home this morning, I went through numerous blocs of vehicles where everyone was going at least 30 over, in spite of the increased police presence. It's very very weird. I've noticed lately this weird trend where drivers are acting like the police mean nothing. Do you suppose they know something about the impending Armageddon that I don't know?
lostdog From: lostdog Date: May 21st, 2004 06:43 am (UTC) (Link)
cops? there's cops on the roads?

As an insane northern virginia driver, i've got to say i rarely see cops, and generally they're more concerned about HOV violations or other silly things. I have once, in my entire life, seen someone pulled over on the beltway.
From: sleepinbeauty Date: May 21st, 2004 08:31 am (UTC) (Link)
Well, it wasn't on the interstates, and by Northern Virginia, I mean Prince William County highways. I have never seen a single person pulled over on the Beltway for speeding.
baronmind From: baronmind Date: May 21st, 2004 06:54 am (UTC) (Link)
Got me...how long is it between the issue date of a ticket and when you have to appear in court? Maybe the timetable's a little tighter than we thought.
protoclown From: protoclown Date: May 21st, 2004 06:36 am (UTC) (Link)
Looks like you had a lot of fun with that! And a mighty impressive fort indeed. And I would know, for I've had my own adventures in this area as well. You may find them amusing if you didn't see them back when I posted them in my own journal. It involves Roger, Scott, Josh and I being dorks.
baronmind From: baronmind Date: May 21st, 2004 08:16 am (UTC) (Link)
Very nice! I actually saw this a while ago, before I'd met you...Scott must have directed me to it, or something. Anyway, it's a good thing you sent it to me again because I apparently forgot to read the second page last time. Good work with the laser armbands!
From: calloocallay Date: May 21st, 2004 07:52 am (UTC) (Link)
I fed a cocktail mermaid to a stuffed Cthulu just this Saturday night, in fact. He is a fearsome foe, and worthy of being your first defense. So... is every Thursday do something different day?
baronmind From: baronmind Date: May 21st, 2004 08:07 am (UTC) (Link)
Yep! It stems from a comment by justnathan, and has been going on for almost three months now. So far, I've:
Despite the irony of having a regularly scheduled day to do something different, I highly recommend it. It's been a lot of fun so far. Also, whereas before when I'd tell people about whatever weird idea I'd had, they'd look at me askance, now they just ask, "Is it Thursday?"
protoclown From: protoclown Date: May 21st, 2004 01:41 pm (UTC) (Link)
One of these days (when I don't have my weekly Thursday writing group) we'll have to get together and Do Something Different. I mean, aside from attending a political lecture.
hello_jaime From: hello_jaime Date: May 21st, 2004 10:05 am (UTC) (Link)
i used to make forts like that all the time!! my sister would make one, and i'd make one, and then we'd decide whos was better. or sometimes we'd go over to our cousin's house and build HUGE ones and we'd play monopoly and sleep in them. it was so great.
vermilionsun From: vermilionsun Date: May 21st, 2004 01:29 pm (UTC) (Link)
That is a sweet fort! Especially love Cthulhu and the reading lamp. What more does one need?

The snag in building our fort was that it had to accommodate 4 grown people, all of whom needed to be able to see the TV (well, computer screen anyway). Had the view not been so essential to our evening's plans, we could've made it much more like a fortress.
gwferguson From: gwferguson Date: May 21st, 2004 02:54 pm (UTC) (Link)
Build a sofa fort as an adult?

WHAT A GREAT IDEA!

Oh, man...my mind reels! I was an only child which meant that the basement and its furniture were pretty much my own private domain. Armed with sofa cushions, a cardtable or two, maybe a blanket and some collapsible lawn furniture I whiled away many a summer evening constructing elaborate tunnel systems and watching television (mostly reruns and summer replacement shows) in the '60s.

IT'S TIME TO DO IT AGAIN!
heartlessempath From: heartlessempath Date: May 21st, 2004 03:28 pm (UTC) (Link)
I think I love you. That's the coolest thing I've ever heard of anyone over say, 20, doing. You rock.
alpheratz From: alpheratz Date: July 30th, 2004 09:48 am (UTC) (Link)
Dude, is *that* the photo you used for your laptop wallpaper when I saw it at BIQ?
baronmind From: baronmind Date: July 30th, 2004 10:45 am (UTC) (Link)
Yup!
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